Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Blue Hat for a Blue Day

No exercise today..couldn't wake up. Also postponed kickboxing trial class..not in the mood.

Food diary
Breakfast: toast with peanut butter
Lunch: McD double cheeseburger large value meal
Dinner: Claypot udon soup

You can tell I am a little distressed when I start eating comfort food like french fries. I am definitely failing MISERABLY at my first resolution of losing weight. The ironic part is I AM fulfilling my resolution of preparing for a marathon..ie I eat as though I am going to run a marathon.

Just feel a little blue today, reflecting upon myself. I seem to be rather easily irritable these days. Some days I feel like a Jekyll and Hyde, one minute I am pleasant, next minute I become a monster. I do feel this constant struggle between flesh and spirit as Paul described in Romans 7. Sometimes I just want to scream out loud "STOP IT!!" It's like having 2 inner beings tearing you apart. Or like a game of tug-o'-war. At times like these, I like to listen to music. And I've been listening to Steven Curtis Chapman again. Another of my favourite songs is "Believe me now". Listening to it reminds me of God's promises to us. And I know God has been with me all the time, through my sorrows and joy. Amen.


I watch you looking out across the raging water
So sure your only hope lies on the other side
You hear the enemy that's closing in around you
And I know that you don't have the strength to fight
But do you have the faith to stand and...

Believe Me now
Believe Me here
Remember all the times I've told you loud and clear
I am with you and I am for you
So believe Me now
Believe Me now

I am the One who waved my hand and split the ocean
I am the One who spoke the words and raised the dead
And I've loved you long before I set the world in motion
I know all the fears you're feeling now
But do you remember who I am?
Do you..

Believe Me now
Believe Me here
Remember all the times I've told you loud and clear
I am with you
And I am for you

So believe Me now
Believe it's true
I never have, I never will abandon you
And the God that I have always been
I will forever be
So believe Me now

I am the God who never wastes a single hurt that you endure
My words are true, and all My promises are sure
So believe Me now
Oh, believe Me now

No comments: