What is it?

I can't really explain what I am going through right now. It's only been 2 days since I've lost Razor but I don't feel upset right now. I've been quite happy today. I haven't cried at all today. Infact, I actually feel his presence, I feel like he's still here with me even though physically I can't see him. When I get back to my room, I can still almost imagine him crawling under my bed where he likes to sleep whenever he comes to my room. How can I not be upset? It's only been 2 days.

Is it all just psychological? Am I becoming a lunatic?

Or am I in denial?

Am I becoming heartless?

Is it because I've been busy and haven't had time to mull?

Is it because I am relieved that he doesn't have to suffer?


I don't know. I love my little Razor but why am I not upset today? I don't feel like I miss him because I feel as though he's still here.

Maybe I am losing it.